grey

what's it like
for the one who leaves
and the one who stays
trapped
under a collapsed home
trying to breathe
with lungs
filled with ashes and
dry dust

is the energy of your world
holding and moving with you
into love, community, connection
a life of relief and lightness
new everything

because here
in our bed- my bed,
in our home- my home,
it's a gravesite
where I'm digging the grave
being buried
and mourning
all at once

it's dusk on the longest night
shadows, and cold air
no shoes
wet matches
hard ground